So, Dustractor what did you do today?

Before I went to bed, I realized that my sister’s old ipod touch with the cracked screen had an alarm clock on it.

That’s pretty sweet. Ima start practice being a normal person. Trying again. Set an alarm clock and do what it says.

It felt good. I remember that ‘workin-man headrush’ that happens when you get up to go to work and you stand up out of bed and feel dizzy because you didn’t get enough sleep but at the same time you realize that you are up early, or at least up. I used to do that but HughesNet had it’s way with me and now even though we finally as of mid-2016 got high-speed internet yes I know holy shit right?

Ugh. I don’t even want to go there. I still get the HughesNet in my inbox, because I signed up for their forum once just to post my rage at them on their forum along with the rest of the unfortunate HughesNet customers. And so now, because of that, I am able to see the constant stream outpouring of HughesNet-Induced-Rage that literally gushes forth from their forum.

And they are just some unheard-of little company, compared to the likes of Comcast or Verizon, both of which seem to recieve the lion’s share when it comes to public airing of discontent about an ISP. I used to work for an ISP, back in the days when they had webmasters and such. I know how it is. You buy a bunch of equipment and get a lease on some actual bandwidth, along with a block of numbers, and then you parcel that out to your local customers. No matter what, it’s never enough, not even if you’re the big guys. Their shit goes obsolete according to the same pattern as anybody else.

So, it sucks living in a residential area knowing that somewhere out there, there are rooms full of obsoleted equipment, old dialup stuff, and literally actually that would be fine for the people who have to choose between no internet and satellite internet. Dialup used to be what like 19.95 at most? Maybe in the heyday of dialup there were some $50 and up packages but it seems like it got pretty cheap towards the end.

The availability of dialup ended before there was any other option, other than satellite, which is great I’m sure if you live in Alaska or something, but the very existance of the satellite option takes away the incentive for a ‘real’ ISP to move into the area. People, go ahead and laugh at me when I say this but I’m telling you, DIALUP FUCKING INTERNET WOULD BE BETTER THAN HUGHES FUCKING NET!

Do you want to know why? Because dialup would not be costing so much damn money! Let us do the math. Our bill for 5 + 50 Gb/mo was almost 80 bucks a month. That fifty Gb was during the hours of 2am-7am, thus why my sleeping pattern became inverted.

We were on the cheapest no-frills plan. What is the cheapest dialup plan? I’ll be conservative here and say 20, even though I’ve seen ads for 9.95/mo dialup. Sixty bucks diff? Nah, I’ll just say fifty.

Fifty more dollars per month just didn’t seem worth it, when all I wanted to do was occasionally google something and end up on StackOverflow or at github, pushing and pulling mere kilobytes. IDGAF about pictures, music, video, games, apps, none of that. Words. FUKIN WERDS MAIN NAWMSAAAAN? Words because the only fucking thing in this world that has any meaning is meaning itself. Words are not an end, but they are a means to convey a meaning, and understanding meanings is life in a nutshell. Having and being go hand in hand but there really is some sort of an imbalance in the world where it seems like it’s beyond the possibility of an individual to not be fucked the fuck up to hell and back way the fucking hell hella fucked the fuck up.

Yeah so enough of that I just wanted to give one more go at getting out my HughesNet Rage. And, say I guess that maybe local governments and municipalities probably ought not to scrap their existing dialup infrastructure if they haven’t already. Because there’s a large group of people who need to look something up or do email but they do .

… fuck the daily and the hourly system freeze … I lost my train of thought because the computer died back there.

Dammit I’ve not gone a day for the last five years where my computer didn’t restart or freeze at least once. Thank god for vim though, dem swp files. Because you know, writing a jekyll post isn’t just some fire up your editor and start typing kind of a framework. Well, it’s almost, but post format requires you to know the date and name your stinkin’ file with it or it won’t work and it’s just that kind of bullshit that gets in people’s way. Oh this digital age. Here we go apparently crashing on a continual basis world-wide because you know, if there is one thing that computers truly excel at it would be crashing. Or at least, I’ve not owned one in the last decade that didn’t have a tendency to do that all the time. I am like a flea in a jar, conditioned not to do anything fun like physics simulation or even gaming. Ok, typing it is. What shall we type? Words? I don’t have any business with them, being that I am a person devoid of any meaning other that what people might ascribe. I’m not a gonna scribe some meaning where I don’t see any. What is my meaning in life right now? Not to kill myself, I guess. Be a good example of how not to kill yourself. No seriously I wouldn’t do it mum I’d hate to think you’d stumbled upon this silly rant stuffed in one of the dark corners of the internet but yeah so suicide? Hmm… No I couldn’t do it. I have a sister.

For a while there I was recuperating from a head injury. ‘The Perfect Coffee Cup’ broke it’s handle off on my head while I was flipping my dad’s truck. I was otherwise unscathed, but for a sharp jab on top the noggin. I was bleeding. Bonnie C. drove by just after it happened so I managed to get home before shock set in. Then I slept for 18 hours and then it was time to go back to work and then after that figure out how to get the truck off the highway. Yeah so people were pissed and blaming me for wrecking a truck that already had no brakes, no second gear, bald tires, and a busted u-joint. Also no speedometer. So yeah I bet you think I must have been haulin’ it, huh? In the fog and rain? Shit, my speedometer was a coffee cup on the dash. Do you get it? Do you understand? If the coffee cup slid around a curve, depending on how much coffee in it, then it meant about 25-30 mph, and the coffee cup didn’t slide. The sticky clutch stuck and then unstuck, gunning it in third for just a split second, but then a fishtail away from a huge ass ditch because that’s what we have on the side of the road around here. You think my unsafe driving caused it? Really? Oh, I get it, I shouldn’t have been driving that truck. Ok, so what other vehicle would you propose? Should I just take one because a having a job ergo vehicle is more important than abiding by basic principle? So here I am, stuck in the middle of nowhere during some sort of economic downturn, me and my head injury and my crashy computer on internet that only worked at night, sure there’s supposedly jobs to do stuff online but what the fuck? How the fuck else to make any living other than … I don’t even know what people do around here besides cut trees down and raise cattle. I’d like to make stuff out of wood but we don’t have any tools and most of our wood is rotten anyway. So I’m left with not many choices. I could get some glue and stick all of my shit together and call it modern art, or I could maybe try to attain some proficiency at a framework or two, an api here and there, maybe some languages, a few tools, and hope for the best. Maybe when they round us all up and huck us in camps, at least one of the guards might want to know how to set up jekyll or something. I could teach somebody what to put in their vimrc, for example how to get the clipboard to work most of the time, or how to make a button to run make and to put shit in a Makefile for what to do. I could teach the young uns all about how to alias git add .;git commit -m foo;git push to a word such as shitfuck, for instance. ( That’s what my shitfuck word means to me, at least. I you ever see a commit named foo, it was just me, shitfucking.

Kitty got up a while ago but her butt smell still on my arm.